A Valentine

From: Me
To: False Hope

You
preclude
happy hymns
and joy elude. 
My poor paper heart,
so shoddily glued
with speculative promise
and notions quite misconstrued.
It is such a small, sad Valentine;
but another discarded billet doux.

Spring

 Spring

thaw, bloom

raining, running, changing

melted, slushy, chilly, muddy

creeping, transforming, unfolding 

burgeoned, fresh, fair

Vernal

waiting at a bus stop on an autumn morning.

"God is in everything." --Mercedes (The Count of Monte Cristo)

Before the sun has burned away the fog in the cold morning, the naked trees cast ethereal shadows as the sun rises behind them. The dawn paints a conflagration of blazing golds and violent lashes of purple across the pale daybreak...

My eyes water with epiphany. How can people be sleeping, I wonder, while all this beauty is occurring--even though, conversely, I sometimes wish I were one of them?

I felt blessed to witness this secret beauty. It reminded me of God.

know in words that which you have always known in thought

[There is a name written on my heart.]

_

I am a writer of lists. Little memorandums of groceries, movies, playlist tracks, lexicon, errands, or boys I have lent my heart to. Footnotes tacked to my door trail across my vision as I run to school each morning and the margins of my writing tablet are riddled with notations so cryptic even I won't be able to decipher them at the end of the day.

Detergent

Amelie

Vito's Ordination Song

Inori (prayer)

Drop off resume

It occurs to me that I should save these deciduous leaflets of thought, so I paste them together in a book of other extracts from the vicissitudes of my life.

Lists of: Often unfinished chores, verse excerpts, epistles secret and unsent, options post-graduation, reasons I love my sister, lost items, umbrages I've yet to forgive, scriptures that speak to me, tangohen (vocabulary).

Maybe when I look back at the close I'll find I've recollected something else entirely.

_

[And I've scratched it out so many times there is a tear now.]

Betwixt the Sand and Foam

"I am forever walking upon these shores, Betwixt the sand and the foam, The high tide will erase my foot-prints, And the wind will blow away the foam. But the sea and the shore will remain Forever." - Gibran (Sand and Foam)

Oh, California...

the ancient paths

"Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls." --Jeremiah 6:16


Went to a three day seminar in Spokane called the Ancient Paths with Joan, Jamus, Joel, and David.
I came back feeling like I'd shed a veil of gloom on the windows of my spirit. I think the others felt the same.
Jamus unburies something dark and grievous and for the first time in my life I begin to understand why I survived what I did: I can offer compassion and understanding on a level that many can't.
Joanie trembles under the weight of her burdens and we wonder why it took so long and lavish all the love we can muster on her.
David sniffs (as stoically as a guy who's about to cry can) and I'm so so proud of him.
"Hey, princess." Joel says, and his face is open and beautiful.
I am so glad we got to walk that path together.

Celestial Sorrow

[Tears]

Soft tears fall like stars
Born of fire and of ice
Burning and drowning


Will the rain cease or follow? Who cares about tomorrow! Whatever lies beyond this morning is a little later on.